A Girl's Heart
by BriiDream
Summary: Three witches deal with heartache and the confused array of emotions that threatens to overwhelm them. Pairings listed inside. This takes place mostly in the movie-verse.
1. Cho

**Harry Potter does not belong to me, but to J.K. Rowling.**

**This is a result of my discussion with my mom about movie-version Cho Chang. PAIRINGS: cho/cedric, cho/harry**

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**A Girl's Heart**

I never know what to do anymore. No one comes near me-except for Marietta. Even she doesn't understand. No one understands.

"WillyougototheYuleBallwithme?" Harry Potter blurted in a rush. I had an idea what he said, but I wasn't sure. I asked, and he replied. "Will you go to the Yule Ball with me?"

_Yes, Harry, I will._ Even as the traitorous thoughts passed through my mind, I was replying to his request, "I'm sorry, Harry, I'm going with someone else."

I heard the regret loud and clear in my voice-I was certain he did, too. That didn't stop his face from falling in disappointment. I didn't want to disappoint him. He muttered something that I didn't catch, but I decided to leave anyway. My letter was sent. I shouldn't stick around.

"Cho!"

I turned and practically rushed back to Harry. _Too eager. _He asked me who I was going with. I spoke softly the name that, until five minutes ago, was all it took to have my heart in overdrive, my stomach full of dancing butterflies, my face hot with the rush of blood: "Cedric Diggory."

Harry nodded and turned away from me. I shouldn't have said anything, but my traitorous thoughts had already poisoned my body, my tongue. I called out the traitorous words that I knew would come back to bite me later, "Harry, I really am sorry."

"You look gorgeous, Cho," Cedric breathed on my neck as we stood ready to enter the Great Hall. I smiled back at him. My heart was pounding in excitement; my stomach was so full of butterflies that I thought they would make me lift off the floor. Cedric smiled sweetly back at me-my perfect prince.

We enter the Great Hall. We danced with the other champions, although I felt like we were the only ones on the dance floor. My eyes never left his equally excited eyes as we twirled around and he lifted me effortlessly through the air. A prince and princess-the center of the universe.

"Let's get some drinks," I suggested breathlessly as the song changed to an even faster beat. He led me through the crowds to the drinks. Viktor Krum was there with Hermione Granger. Cedric, the ever-so perfect gentleman, talked to the Durmstrang champion as if they were classmates, not competitors locked in a deadly tournament that would gain them recognition from all over the world. I looked over at Hermione. She was upset; I could tell even though she kept a smooth face. I wasn't in Ravenclaw for nothing. I followed her glance to the table where Harry (_don't blush_) and his friend, Ron Weasley, sat. I wondered if they had fought. I wondered why I even cared. _Because she is Harry's friend-closer to him._

Fleur Delacour's scream ripped through the nighttime air, cutting over the cheers of the audience too far away to see. I wasn't lucky enough. Why did I have to be so close? Why did I have to see?

Harry laid sobbing across Cedric-both bloody, both battered. But my eyes didn't move away from Cedric's face-his wide, unseeing eyes that gaped up at the starry sky. Screams and shouts filled the air around me. People rushed forward. I moved with them. _No, no don't. Please…_ I stood just a few feet from them. I heard Harry's broken cries that You-Know-Who had returned. You-Know-Who had killed Cedric,_ my prince-my fallen, broken prince._

I stared at the photo of Cedric. My grip on my wand tightened. I was getting better at defense-_Harry said so_. I stared at his charming smile. He was happy, unaware that his death would be the first violent one of this new war against You-Know-Who.

I felt Harry step up beside me. My senses had gone haywire whenever I was near him this year. _Harry, Harry, Harry._ I tore my eyes from Cedric's face. My eyes stung-it did it often now. Harry smiled understandingly. _Like Cedric. _We both looked up at the mistletoe above us. Our lips touched-his were hesitant, mine was eager. _His first kiss-Cedric was mine._ I was so used to them that I didn't even notice the first flow of tears spilling over my cheeks onto his. I sucked in a wobbly breath as his lips pulled away a millimeter. _I didn't pull away._ He was gone before I opened my eyes. I didn't even wipe the tears away. I grabbed my bookbag and left the Room of Requirement. I headed back to the Ravenclaw tower.

I was numb-no, I was in pain-no, I was ashamed-no, I was afraid. I never made it to the Ravenclaw tower. It wasn't until hours later that I was found on the cold tiles of the girls' bathroom by Marietta. I didn't look at her. She stood over me for a few minutes-_hesitating (they always do)_-before kneeling down beside me. In a few minutes she would be gone, to whatever class we had this morning while I remained here on the cold tiles. My swollen eyes closed; there were no tears left to cry.

I never know what to do anymore. No one comes near me-except for Marietta. Even she doesn't understand. No one understands.


	2. Hermione

Harry Potter does not belong to me, but to J.K. Rowling.

**Another one done this time on movie-version Hermione; result of a discussion of the PoA movie with my stepdad. I have included a few things from the books. PAIRINGS: hermione/ron, hermione/viktor**

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**A Girl's Heart**

Emotional rollercoaster-that's what it's called. I sometimes wondered if it was worth it in the end. The fights, the pain, the loneliness, the passion-would I really do it all over again if given the chance? I don't know.

"Crookshanks didn't kill your dumb rat, Ron," I screamed for the umpteenth time. I wasn't keeping track. It felt like that was all I did these days. If it wasn't Ron, it was Harry. _No one thinks I care-I just do it out of spite. Go smash your head in a 400-feet fall, Harry! At least everyone will see you on your brilliant broom!_

"You owe someone an apology," I snapped at Ron as he cuddled that hideous rodent-_I hated it_ _with a passion_. It took the only true friendships I had away. I was alone; I was hurt; I cried. But before I could consider putting Ron through what I did to Malfoy, the pitcher shattered behind me.

Viktor offered me his arm; he was a gentleman, something that was rare here in Hogwarts. We lined up with the other champions. We swirled graciously around the dance floor. For his usual stiff disposition, Viktor was fun-loving (_so much like my boys_); we danced for most of the time.

When he slipped off for drinks, I sat down beside Harry. I was radiant. _More than ever before._ I didn't catch their moods, until Ron shot his hurtful words towards me. They pained me, along with his burning, resentful eyes. Harry looked at neither of us. _But it was Ron's side he took, it always was._ My mood was ruined. I left them, but Viktor was unable to pull me out of the abyss Ron had flung me into. _My chest was on fire._

We were headed back to the dorms. Ron wouldn't stop-my temper refuse to let up. I screamed at him. This is what he got for choosing me as his last resort. _As if I wasn't good enough to be anything else._ He shrugged it off. I screamed at him, at Harry. Both were startled; they raced upstairs. _Not caring about my pain-why should I hurt? I was just Granger, the bookworm._

I plopped down on the steps. The tears streamed down my face. I paid no attention to those around me. My perfect first date was ruined by those I thought stood by me. _Of course they do, they do when they need me…_

Ron had performed brilliantly, and now Harry decided to share the fact that he hadn't cheated. Ron was great. _I shouldn't have doubted either._ Before I could even go over to offer my congratulations, Lavender Brown hopped up beside Ron and pulled him into a long snog. _Snogging my Ron._ Ron returned it just as enthusiastically. I went numb, but somehow managed to slip out of the crowded Common Room. _Too stifling, too happy…not like the world was collapsing around me._

I gasped and my body shuddered with my muffled sobs. Harry sat beside me. I asked him what it was like. He didn't reply. _There was no need to._ Then _they_ showed up. Lavender smiled insensitively._ Like she didn't know what she had done to me. Like I wasn't human with emotions._ She left, but he stayed back. He commented so airily on my canaries. _Always nonchalant, heartless._ My eyesight blurred, but the canaries understood my heart more than anyone else's. I didn't see Ron's panicked look as he barely evaded the canaries who smashed into the wall behind him (_like my heart smashing into millions of little shards_).

I collapsed back on the step. My sobs were audible now-my pain loud and clear. But the world doesn't hear, he doesn't hear. Harry holds me-_the first time choosing me, not Ron._ I hear his heartbeat in his chest; the rhythm, the same as mine, beating out the pain. He held me while the tears stopped flowing, the sobs quieted. He held me as the silence fell around us. _Held me as the pain continued to pulse._

Emotional rollercoaster-that's what it's called. I sometimes wondered if it was worth it in the end. The fights, the pain, the loneliness, the passion-would I really do it all over again if given the chance? I don't know.


	3. Pansy

**Harry Potter does not belong to me, but to J.K. Rowling.**

**This is a result of my analysis of the train scene on the Half-Blood Prince movie. This is AU for the most part. PAIRINGS: pansy/draco, pansy/blaise**

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**A Girl's Heart**

Slytherins know their purpose-to preserve the purebloods' wizarding world away from the detested Muggles and Mudbloods. Emotions are left behind with childhood glories-love is meaningless in the continuation of our world. Half-bloods like Davis are ignorant of that.

Draco was tensed, as if expecting an attack. I reassured him that it was probably just a prank. He finally sat down as Blaise sat beside me. Draco didn't look at either me or Blaise. His father's imprisonment was taking a toll on him. _Too pale, too thin. _This wasn't the Draco that I fell for in another, more innocent lifetime.

"I don't see myself sticking around for another two years at this despicable school," Draco sneered. I was stunned. Draco had always scorned Hogwarts-_of course with that bumbling fool in charge_. But to leave? Blaise scoffed, not impressed. Draco threw him a dirty look (_not his-too bitter, too haunted_) and told him to watch to see who was laughing in the end.

We arrived at Hogwarts with, thankfully, no more mentions of leaving. Hogwarts without Draco was…impossible. I followed Blaise to the exit, but stopped when I didn't sense Draco behind me. I called back to his still figure. Blaise waited with me. Draco dismissed us. _Always in charge; always the leader._ I passed Blaise on the way off the train. I felt his eyes on the back of my head as I joined my own gang. I raised my head haughtily. _Like Draco, a leader._

All of us Slytherins cheered when Professor Snape was announced DADA professor. _Except Draco-lost in his thoughts-prisoner of his own mind._ I touched his hand in concern. He barely glanced at me. I pulled away._ Stung not by fire, but the sharp tongue of ice._ I refused to acknowledge the growing barrier between him and me.

I was sitting in the Common Room, long after the others had gone to bed. I had started to pick the habit (_obsession_) up. Whenever Draco returned was when I would go to bed. I might not have even existed with the way he would creep quietly through the Common Room to the Boys' Dorm without sparing me a single glance.

It wasn't until midnight when he arrived. I had blocked his normal path so he would have no choice but to pass by me. I swept my hair out of my face. _Such a mess, like him._ Draco walked in my direction, once realizing the other was impossible. The fire gave very little light, but when he was just a few inches away from me, I noticed his swollen, reddened eyes. _He was ill-so sick._

"Draco," I called in a low, pleading voice. He stopped and looked back at me. _His eyes were dead-just like Cedric Diggory's in fourth year._ My heart dropped out of my chest; I couldn't breathe. This wasn't my Draco. _This was an empty puppet._ "Draco, please. Let me help."

He reached and touched my messed-up hair. He looked like he was in a dream world-_not here with me._ He stroked my hair once. The hair I grew out for him when he told me he liked it better long than short in third year. My lips formed a quivering, hesitant smile. Then his hand, and the rest of him, was gone.

Our mouths moved with their own, joined rhythm. His tongue danced across my bottom lip, darting in for one caress of my own. _A different language, a different song._ I felt his hands run through my hair ruining the perfect waves that took me two hours this morning. I pulled back to breathe-his own pants were slightly heavier than my own. He didn't speak-_the rule of the game._ My eyes remained closed as my breathing slowly steadied. His bored holes into my face. _D*** Italians. _He tugged my hair, and my eyes opened reluctantly.

Standing behind Blaise were Daphne and the others. They had slipped in without either of us noticing. _How long?_ Long enough I was sure. Blaise pulled away and grabbed his bookbag. He was the bodily form of vanity. _Surpassing me, surpassing Draco._ He walked proudly away-no shame, no guilt, no pain to hide.

I walked out the Common Room followed by my girls._ Practically treading my heels._ I went to the girls' bathroom where Daphne immediately began to recorrect my hair into the way I had it earlier. They were quiet, unusual, waiting for the dish. _I despised being the dish._ I left the girls' bathroom headed to Potions._ Where both would be._

Right before the girls parted from me, Tracey Davis spoke up, wondering loudly what Draco would say to such competition. The others eagerly eyed us, waiting for my response. _What does the Unforgivables feel like?_ I didn't look back. I was a leader (_never to be undermined_). I was just as stunned as they were by my venomous, non-shrilled response: "There is no competition as any proper pureblood would know. Keep your filthy half-blood ways out of my affairs."

I left them. I stopped outside the dungeon classroom as Draco approached. He was even more ill than before. The stress showed clearly. He passed indifferently by me. I followed. Draco took a seat beside Blaise. I sat in front of them. Blaise's eyes bore holes into the back of my head the entire period. He was the only one I noticed. I no longer sensed Draco-not even within centimeters of him. _Empty, nothing was there._ There was no barrier, there was nothing. I swallowed the lump in my throat. _Draco was gone._

Slytherins know their purpose-to preserve the purebloods' wizarding world away from the detested Muggles and Mudbloods. Emotions are left behind with childhood glories-love is meaningless in the continuation of our world. Half-bloods like Davis are ignorant of that.


End file.
